Chill With a Side of Extra
I’ve always wanted to be just like my mother. She is everything that I want to be and more! From my vantage point, she is carefree, yet, passionate about everything that she puts her mind to. When I was younger, I wanted to dress like my mother and be right by her side at all times. As I grew older, I would beam with satisfaction whenever someone said I looked just like her because it was satisfying to hear that they saw my mother in me. Although the resemblance is striking, a major difference between my mother and I is her bold personality versus my laid back style.
My Mom and I headed to the same school to learn and teach respectively.
It's quite ironic that my mother named this blog "Extra is My Ordinary" because that’s exactly what I would describe her as: "extra". I would associate this adjective with my mother during my preteen years especially because when you're 12 and 13 years old, anything that your mother does around your friends is embarrassing. Just when I thought school was an escape, my mother started teaching there in my same grade level with a classroom full of the most popular kids at school. This situation was the epitome of my mother's "extraness" and nothing could be more embarrassing for me, or so I believed! It was just my luck, I was unable to escape the watchful eye of my mother and my 13-year-old peers noticed this. My low-key nature was completely shaken by this experience because nothing could get passed her, and she never switched up her maternal habits just because we were in her workplace. This was the first of several occasions in which I realized that there was no escaping my mother’s extra personality.
My first day of High School and I decided to dress like my Mom
Moving past the dreaded preteen years, I started to see that being "extra" was not as embarrassing as I made it out to be. I recognized that my mom’s extra-ness was used to steer me in the right direction in life and encourage me to always take the extra mile. This mentality revealed itself during the college application process. Whenever I would resort to chilling or even think about procrastinating on my applications, my mother was always right behind me ensuring that I gave it my best. With my mother, there was no slacking off because she always wants the best for me! Even though I thought I had all the time in the world, she reminded me that simply meeting deadlines is a substandard way to be. Instead, she made sure I was way ahead just so I can have control over a stressful situation. All in an effort to be certain that I gave my full potential, the pushing paid off, and I can now say that gratitude for her extra-ness prevailed.
My decked out dorm room
When I decided on my university of choice, the date to move into my college dorm room rapidly approached and before long it was time to start shopping. Through my laid back/chill eyes, it seemed like everything my mother saw she wanted me to have at school. Every item in the shopping cart was justified with "You're going to need this" and "This is perfect for you to have in your room!" I was overwhelmed; there was no way that I was going to need 3 carts filled with 5 pillows and 7 different bed sheet sets in addition to the ones I already had. This continued right until the day I moved in. Unbelievably, I found myself in another Tj Maxx, on move-in day in DC, buying a portable desk that I could use on my bed for studying! While I fought her on every single thing that she picked up and put in that shopping cart, turns out she was right. How did she even know that having 7 different bed sheets would make me feel more at home? Or that a portable desk would be just the handy thing I need? My mother went to the ends of the Earth to make sure that I was more than prepared for college and life. This preparation started with my kindergarten teacher saying, “Dhymond is very responsible!”
Mom and I in Panama, July 2018
I’ve learned to appreciate that having a Mom who doesn’t compromise being “extra” has truly benefited me. So far, I feel more than prepared for the many twists and turns that college life will throw at me. It’s really comforting that she cares for me in this way. My mother's extra-ness is one of the best things about her! I can’t believe I’m admitting this, but my appreciation for being extra has helped me to realize that I am chill with a side of extra. I wonder if that will change to extra is my ordinary one day, but for now I’m extremely happy with the way things are turning out to be.
Are you the extra parent or are you the child trying to maintain their chill? Where are you on this journey? Tell me in the comments below!
Dhymond is an 18 year old college student who is becoming the woman God wants her to be. As a Sophomore at The George Washington University, she majors in Latin American Studies and Criminal Justice. Dhymond's interests include dance, service, being involved in many organizations on campus, practicing to speak Spanish, and spending time with her family and friends.